I spent the morning with a young patient who, for lack of a better description, is trapped inside of her suffering. Disease has stolen too much—her youth, her family, her dreams. She is unable to verbalize her pain and fears, her disappointment; but on certain days, for hours at a time, she screams and wails. As we who care for her listen to her cries, the intensity of her anguish is not only heard—it is felt. It is, to say the least, an exhausting process. During the times when she cries, we try all kinds of interventions to bring her, and also us, relief from the pain.
In these moments, I am confronted with the message that teaches “Love is patient and love is kind…” It seems so poetic and romantic in print, but I am finding that it is remarkably challenging to live out. With all of my heart, I believe that everything that is done in love is holy; but in truth, I have never been more aware of my weakness and my limitations than I am in this season of life. While at the same time, I have never been more convinced of the sufficiency of God. It is humbling but also refreshing to realize that God does not want or need me to strive to achieve anything, especially love, within my own power. He longs for me to grow in trust and to rely upon His strength.
Today, after two hours of constant screaming and feeling like nothing would work, I said to the Living Room team: “let’s sit with her and pray.” As she continued to weep, we sat at her bedside and began crying out to God on her behalf. In the middle of our prayers, as we pleaded for God to quiet her with His love, she fell into a deep sleep. Peace, beyond my understanding, was present. God was near.
As the Living Room team, we have been reminded again of the power of prayer and want to thank you for your faithful love and support.
